Tag Archive | "marriage"

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Are you ready to find “The One”?

Posted on 07 January 2013 by Lui

Do you want to discover a powerful process to “call in” your soulmate and create a committed, loving partnership?

Then join us for another groundbreaking event of the year!

I’m reminding you about a no-cost online seminar called: Calling in “The One”: How to Release Your Hidden Barriers to Love and Become Magnetic to Your Soulmate, hosted by an extraordinary colleague of mine: bestselling author Katherine Woodward Thomas, MA, MFT.

>>> Register here for the no-cost Calling in “The One” Online Seminar

At the age of 41, Katherine created a process to “call in” a new conscious, committed loving relationship in just 7 weeks. By the age of 42, she was married and gave birth to her daughter, Alexandria, the following year.

Pretty soon, word of her miraculous process began to spread around the country, and before long, she was receiving hundreds of requests to write down her process so that others could use it, as well.

Random House gave her a book deal and she quickly became a national bestselling author.

Then Katherine met Claire Zammit (an acclaimed expert in women’s transformation who had used Katherine’s process to “call in” her own husband!) and together they created the Calling in “The One” course, using Katherine’s book as its foundation.

And thousands of people around the world are now living happy lives in love because of it.

>>> Go here to learn more about the proven process of Calling in “The One” 

The reason the Calling in “The One” process is so effective is because it starts in a place almost no other approach to finding love does – on the inside.

You see, what most of us don’t realize is that the real obstacles to finding genuine soulmate love are within us. If you’re still single, then there’s a good chance you have unconscious barriers to love.

The good news is that once these barriers are identified, they can be easily transformed.

And it’s this process of personal and spiritual transformation that is so essential to be able to create the true conscious, committed relationship you’re seeking.

You’ll need to tune in to Katherine’s no-cost online seminar to get the whole picture, but the essence of what she teaches is this:

If you yearn for true, lasting love with a soulmate, you don’t need to change anything externally about yourself or your life in order to find it.

You only need to identify and release those hidden inner-obstacles to love that you may not even realize you have.

Instead of spending another year hoping for love that doesn’t show up, you can call in “The One” within weeks or months – you’ll be amazed by how quickly it can happen.

Already, thousands of people who’ve gone through the Calling in “The One” process are experiencing a love they never thought they would.

Here’s an example of what can come from listening to this no-cost online seminar:

“After so many disappointments, I had all but given up on the possibility of ever having love in my life. Luckily, my best friend turned me on to the Calling in “The One” approach. I followed every step of the process faithfully and met my soulmate only a short time later. It’s truly a match made in heaven. I couldn’t be happier!”
Jeanne Millbrae, Illinois

There are also numerous luminaries, including Marianne Williamson, Deepak Chopra, Neale Donald Walsch, and Debbie Ford, who rave about the Calling in “The One” approach.

“For all those seeking to bring a deep and magical love into their lives, Katherine Woodward Thomas has discovered a portal to love and beckons us all to follow her lead.”
Marianne Williamson, author of A Return To Love and A Woman’s Worth

So if you’re committed to attracting and sustaining a powerful, loving and spiritual partnership, join Katherine for her no-cost online seminar and learn how to call “The One” into your life . . .

Register Now for this No-Cost Way to Release Your Hidden Barriers to Love & Become Magnetic to Your Soulmate 

This is the time of year when a lot of people start thinking about setting an intention for the New Year ahead.

If you haven’t settled on anything yet or have room for one more on your list for 2013, I want to invite you to make a commitment to yourself . . .

A commitment that you’ll make this coming year the one you look back on as the year you “called in” your soulmate.

Join Katherine’s no-cost seminar and make 2013 your year for love! 

And don’t worry if you can’t make it live to the online seminar, as long as you register, they’ll send you the recording, so you can listen to it at your convenience.

Blessings,
Dr. Karen Kan

P.S. The average dating service will never understand the spiritual match you need in a partner. And friends who play Cupid probably won’t get it right either. Katherine is an expert who knows how to help you make the internal shifts necessary for you to start becoming magnetic to “The One” you’ve always dreamed of meeting. Don’t miss out on this potential turning point in your life.

Register here for this no-cost online seminar >>> How to Release Your Hidden Barriers to Love and Become Magnetic to Your Soulmate 

P.P.S. And please don’t hesitate to forward this invitation to anyone in your life who you think might be ready for it, too.

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How To Call In Your Soulmate

Posted on 26 December 2012 by Lui

Do you ever wonder why you’re still single?
If you do, you’re not alone.

And if you’re like most people, you want to find a deep and genuine connection, a best friend, a loving partner, and a companion on your journey of spiritual growth and self-development . . . a soulmate.

You want to find “The One.”

That’s why I’m so glad to be able to tell you about this chance to discover a powerful, proven process to help you “call in” your soulmate and create a committed, loving partnership.

It’s a no-cost online seminar called: Calling in “The One”: How to Release Your Hidden Barriers to Love and Become Magnetic to Your Soulmate, and it’s hosted by an extraordinary colleague of mine: bestselling author Katherine Woodward Thomas, MA, MFT.

>>> Register here for the no-cost Calling in “The One” Online Seminar

At the age of 41, Katherine created a process to “call in” a new conscious, committed loving relationship in just 7 weeks. By the age of 42, she was married and gave birth to her daughter, Alexandria, the following year.

Pretty soon, word of her miraculous process began to spread around the country, and before long, she was receiving hundreds of requests to write down her process so that others could use it, as well.

Random House gave her a book deal and she quickly became a national bestselling author.

Then Katherine met Claire Zammit (an acclaimed expert in women’s transformation who had used Katherine’s process to “call in” her own husband!) and together they created the Calling in “The One” course, using Katherine’s book as its foundation.

And thousands of people around the world are now living happy lives in love because of it.

>>> Go here to learn more about the proven process of Calling in “The One” 

The reason the Calling in “The One” process is so effective is because it starts in a place almost no other approach to finding love does – on the inside.

You see, what most of us don’t realize is that the real obstacles to finding genuine soulmate love are within us. If you’re still single, then there’s a good chance you have unconscious barriers to love.

The good news is that once these barriers are identified, they can be easily transformed.

And it’s this process of personal and spiritual transformation that is so essential to be able to create the true conscious, committed relationship you’re seeking.

You’ll need to tune in to Katherine’s no-cost online seminar to get the whole picture, but the essence of what she teaches is this:

If you yearn for true, lasting love with a soulmate, you don’t need to change anything externally about yourself or your life in order to find it.

You only need to identify and release those hidden inner-obstacles to love that you may not even realize you have.

Instead of spending another year hoping for love that doesn’t show up, you can call in “The One” within weeks or months – you’ll be amazed by how quickly it can happen.

Already, thousands of people who’ve gone through the Calling in “The One” process are experiencing a love they never thought they would.

Here’s an example of what can come from listening to this no-cost online seminar:

“After so many disappointments, I had all but given up on the possibility of ever having love in my life. Luckily, my best friend turned me on to the Calling in “The One” approach. I followed every step of the process faithfully and met my soulmate only a short time later. It’s truly a match made in heaven. I couldn’t be happier!”
Jeanne Millbrae, Illinois

There are also numerous luminaries, including Marianne Williamson, Deepak Chopra, Neale Donald Walsch, and Debbie Ford, who rave about the Calling in “The One” approach.

“For all those seeking to bring a deep and magical love into their lives, Katherine Woodward Thomas has discovered a portal to love and beckons us all to follow her lead.”
Marianne Williamson, author of A Return To Love and A Woman’s Worth

So if you’re committed to attracting and sustaining a powerful, loving and spiritual partnership, join Katherine for her no-cost online seminar and learn how to call “The One” into your life . . .

Register Now for this No-Cost Way to Release Your Hidden Barriers to Love & Become Magnetic to Your Soulmate 

This is the time of year when a lot of people start thinking about setting an intention for the New Year ahead.

If you haven’t settled on anything yet or have room for one more on your list for 2013, I want to invite you to make a commitment to yourself . . .

A commitment that you’ll make this coming year the one you look back on as the year you “called in” your soulmate.

Join Katherine’s no-cost seminar and make 2013 your year for love! 

And don’t worry if you can’t make it live to the online seminar, as long as you register, they’ll send you the recording, so you can listen to it at your convenience.

Blessings,
Dr. Karen Kan

P.S. The average dating service will never understand the spiritual match you need in a partner. And friends who play Cupid probably won’t get it right either. Katherine is an expert who knows how to help you make the internal shifts necessary for you to start becoming magnetic to “The One” you’ve always dreamed of meeting. Don’t miss out on this potential turning point in your life.

Register here for this no-cost online seminar >>> How to Release Your Hidden Barriers to Love and Become Magnetic to Your Soulmate 

P.P.S. And please don’t hesitate to forward this invitation to anyone in your life who you think might be ready for it, too.

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The Secret to Healing your Marriage

Posted on 13 November 2012 by Lui

I am writing to you on behalf of my friend and colleague, Dr. Deb Hirschhorn. Did you know that it is possible to fall in love again even when a marriage has gone very bad? Dr. Deb believes – and it’s been proven – that it is. Scroll to the bottom to see the link to the radio show I did with Dr. Deb!

 

Before I say more, let me tell you that Dr. Deb has my complete endorsement. Her approach is unique: She’s all about healing a marriage so it can be better than it ever was or would be if left alone.

 

Her new book, The Healing is Mutual: Marriage Empowerment Tools to Rebuild Trust and Respect—Together, being launched, today, NOVEMBER 13, goes beyond “saving your marriage”  – it’s looking to help couples fall in love again.

 

According to Dr. Deb, a Marriage and Family Therapist, healing—not divorce—is the only good alternative to a bad marriage. See why at http://theHealingIsMutual.com/download.

 

You, personally, may be blessed with a good, happy, affirming marriage, a marriage of love and respect. If you’re not this will surely be of interest to you. Even if your marriage is “okay” – let’s make it better!

 

Besides that, unfortunately, you probably know many people struggling in their marriages. Here is a chance to help them to transform their marriage!

 

When you go to http://theHealingIsMutual.com/download you’ll be astonished by the comments and feedbacks that are there.

According to New York Times best-selling author and marketing whiz, Peggy McColl, “This may be as big as or bigger than Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus– it’s that good and that powerful.

 

THIS MAY BE THE BIGGEST BK ON HEALING THAT YOU HAVE EVER READ!!

 

Please resend this message to your list so everyone is included. Have them visit Dr. Deb’s launch page http://theHealingIsMutual.com/dowload to find out why divorce is a rotten option and why a book can be better help than a counselor to start their marriage over – with the same spouse!

 

Oh, one more thing. There are dozens of free gifts on that page from all Dr. Deb’s colleagues (including one from me) because we believe in what she is doing. We want to see this book out there helping people. Go check out http://theHealingIsMutual.com/dowload and see all the positive feedback this book has already received from people who used it.

 

And if you don’t want to send the email, buy the book for your friends. Leave a copy for them. They will be forever grateful.
You are seeing that The Healing Is Mutual can improve your marriage. It’s clearly worth the small investment of less than two movie tickets.
Here is a word from Dr. Deb herself:

———————–

Hi there,

 

I’m Dr. Deb and if there is one thing I want you to know about me, it’s that my whole approach as a Marriage and Family Therapist to helping couples is NOT about finger-pointing; it’s NOT about “diagnosing” the “problem” and it’s NOT about just “communicating.”

 

My approach is about building on your strengths, being understanding of what you’ve been through, and giving you solutions that are emotional, spiritual, intellectual, and behavioral. You can pick and choose which ones are the best fit for you, but they are all geared to healing. Healed people have space for happiness.

 

I believe that you have suffered and now it’s time to heal.

 

I want to help you heal from your past and your present. I want to help you and your partner to create a beautiful future. I want to help you to fall in love again. It is possible. Go read why on my page http://theHealingIsMutual.com/dowload

 

My very best wishes to you!

 

Dr. Deb

 

———————–

 

So there you have it. And let me say just one more thing before I send this off to you…

 

I visited Dr. Deb’s website to see all she is giving away. And I am telling you … I was AMAZED! You need to check this out for yourself, for sure.

 

http://theHealingIsMutual.com/dowload

 

Dr. Deb is clearly over delivering. And when you see all that she is doing for her readers on Launch Day today, you will certainly agree.

 

Blessings,

Dr. Karen Kan

 

PS. Here is the radio show interview I did with Dr. Deb as an extra bonus! Check it out here: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/drkaren/2012/08/27/heal-your-marriage

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Why singles would want to know how to heal a marriage

Posted on 27 August 2012 by Lui

Did you get a chance to listen to the radio show I did with Dr. Deb Hirschorn on Healing Marriage based on her upcoming book, The Healing is Mutual: Marriage Empowerment Tools? If you didn’t, please listen to the replay here:  http://www.blogtalkradio.com/drkaren/2012/08/27/heal-your-marriage
Everyone comes into marriage with great expectation, not knowing that they also come into marriage with their old wounds. Understanding that marriage can be an opportunity to heal those wounds makes the journey joyful and rewarding. In the show, we talked about:
  • how divorce can be a healing opportunity rather than a court battle
  • how “funny” name-calling can be “put downs” that really hurt the other person and what to say if you’re on the receiving end of these
  • the difference between being “sensitive” and being “victimized”
  • how you get your partner interested in healing your relationship when you’re the only one interested
We got lots of great feedback for this show, so please take the time to listen in, even if you have a happy marriage. If you’re single, it’s just as important that you learn these things as well BEFORE you get married.
For listeners, you can get a free eBook on Signs Your Marriage Needs Help by texting your name and email address to 516-628-6077 or going tohttp://thehealingismutual.com/gift.

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How do I keep him from cheating on me!

Posted on 29 April 2011 by Dr. Karen

Dear Dr. Karen,

I have been married to my husband for 20 years and we have children. Even before we were married, he cheated on me. And he has time and time again! He lies and gets very defensive when I confront him, but eventually the truth comes out. I’ve left him seven times but I always go back. I’ve asked him to leave several times as well, but he always comes begging me to take him back.

And I always take him back because I love him so much. I still love him. I am tired of being hurt by him, but I remain suspicious that he’s seeing someone else behind my back. This way of life has tampered with my self-esteem and in search of solutions I have tried everything.

I now have come across the Law of Attraction but my doubts are still there: does he really love me and want to be with me? and can a situation like this change using the Law of Attraction? Please help!

Nina

Dear Nina,

Thanks for your honest letter. I hope my answer will be helpful to you. But first, I have a question for you?

What are you expecting the Law of Attraction to do for you?

Are you expecting it to magically change your husband so that he isn’t the “cheating type” any longer? Because if that is the case, then I can tell you very easily that the Law of Attraction doesn’t work this way. We can’t use the Law of Attraction to change other people against their free will.

However, what you CAN use the Law of Attraction for is to create happiness for yourself. Whether your husband is part of that ultimate happiness is up to you and the Universe to co-create together. Your Law of Attraction “wish” statement could be something like:

I am thoroughly enjoying a fulfilling romantic relationship with my soulmate.

Sometimes we fool ourselves in thinking we truly love someone when we only truly love certain parts, or aspects, of them. What I mean by this is that you seem to enjoy enough aspects of your spouse to keep him around. But there are aspects of him that you don’t like so you aren’t truly happy. Isn’t that right?

So here’s the truth of the matter:

  • the highest form of love means being able to accept who our lovers are without judgment or expectation, but that doesn’t mean that you always like or enjoy what they are doing. There is a difference.
  • you can’t change another person. You don’t have that kind of control. You can only change yourself and your reactions to situations. When you can change yourself and be fully responsible for your own happiness, then you’ll see the relationship shift remarkably.

So you have a couple of very simple choices here Nina. It is high time you took 100% responsibility for your experiences. He is not responsible for your unhappiness, you are. I don’t mean to sound harsh, but you’ve been on this yo-yo ride for over 20 years now. When will you decide to change your experience? When will you realize that what you’ve been doing all these years doesn’t work?

Here are some choices:

You can choose to accept that your husband “cheats”,  and in that acceptance, you can enjoy him as much as possible when he’s around, and give up trying to change or criticize him for not being who you think he should be (the equivalent of telling a bear that it should acting like an antelope)

Do something drastically different for a change maybe. For example,  study books on open marriages or polyamory and see if any of those resonate with either of you. If “cheating” was genetic, like diabetes, would you be as judgmental of it? Probably not. I’m not saying it is, but what if it was?

Just trying to open minds here…

How about this new thought pattern: Can you entertain the possibility that your husband loving other people in no way diminishes his love for you? Does a candle flame diminish when it lights another candle? Love is light. Think about that.

I’m bringing this up because we’ve been unconsciously indoctrinated in the concept that the ONLY way a relationship can be successful is through monogamy. Anytime there is an absolute rule, we all should be questioning it’s validity, because somewhere, sometime, long ago, someone made that rule in order to control others.

Remember, it wasn’t long ago when women and children were considered a man’s property. And in some parts of the world, they still are (sigh!).

So Nina, in summary, you can either change your perspective (by letting go of victim-hood, judgment or expectations) or change your situation by leaving, but you can’t change him. Got it? Hope so.

So if you’re not willing to leave because having him around is BETTER than not having him around, then just admit to yourself that you’ve CHOSEN this relationship in its current form and stop being the victim. You’re not the victim here. You’re choosing this. When you can be compassionate with yourself about choosing this relationship, then you can let go of all the judgment of how imperfect it is and just ENJOY your husband.

If these steps seem too difficult for you, as I imagine they might be, I suggest that you book yourself into seeing a relationship coach or counselor and get some support. We all need support for our spiritual and personal growth, so I encourage you to be courageous and find an expert that you resonate with.

In the meantime, I highly recommend you pick up a copy of Neale Donald Walsch’s book on Relationships and read it over and over again:

You can also listen to the interview I did with him HERE.

I believe in you Nina. Thanks for helping others with your question.

Blessings,

Dr. Karen Kan
P.S. Anyone reading this post, feel free to comment.

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Discover the Secrets of Happy Couples

Posted on 01 February 2011 by Dr. Karen

With Kim Olver’s new book, Secrets of Happy Couples: Loving Yourself, Your Partner, and Your Life, you’ll have a more loving and satisfying relationship. Because of my relationship with Kim, you got a sneak peak at the valuable advice in the book via the Law of Attraction in Love Radio Show on Monday January 31st when I interviewed Kim before the official launch of her book! If you didn’t get a chance to catch it live, you can listen to or download the archives for f’ree!

Secrets of Happy Couples explains:

  • Exclusive insights and suggestions gained by researching and surveying happy couples
  • Practical advice from a range of experts synthesized into learnable lessons
  • Tips for identifying problems and what to do about them
  • A unique and novel 3-step process for surviving affairs
  • The power of moving beyond “tolerating” differences to truly appreciating them
  • How to meet your partner’s needs and your own at the same time

PLUS!  If you purchase TODAY you will receive more than 60 phenomenal free gifts valued at over $3,500.00! But you must purchase NOW to get your free gifts! Go to  http://www.SecretsofHappyCouples.com

I wholeheartedly recommend this book to people looking for a more satisfying relationship in their lives (and that’s not just because I was one of the “experts” interviewed for the book)!  Whether you are looking for your ultimate love relationship or hoping to improve the one you already have, Secrets of Happy Couples will provide you with a roadmap to a happy, fulfilling and satisfied relationship.

Blessings,

Dr. Karen Kan

PS This is one of the books I will be recommending from now on, to everyone, as one of their relationship “bibles”. Why? Because the information in it is FUNDAMENTAL. Kim has done a wonderful job putting this book together and it is an easy read.

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Dear Dr. Karen: I Think My Wife is Depressed – What Do I Do?

Posted on 28 September 2009 by Dr. Karen

Dr. Karen,

My wife has not been herself for over a year now. She is a Realtor and her career has been in the tank to say the least. She has asked for a separation several times in the last year. We are now separated and the last time she got bad news at work she told me we would be getting a divorce. I feel she may be suffering from depression (I am no expert). She will not listen to me. What should can I do. I LOVE HER!!!

Brian

Dear Brian,

I hear your deep love and concern for your wife. You may be accurate that she may be suffering from depression. Here are some tell-tale signs:

– Crying spells or pronounced irritability
– Unnatural weight gain or loss
– Depressed mood for over 3 weeks
– Losing interest in things she loved (hobbies)
– Poor appetite
– Less socialization with friends
– Suicidal threats/thoughts

If she will not listen to you, then I suggest that unless you feel she is a suicidal threat, it would be best to respect her wishes. Let her know that you love her and are concerned that she may be suffering from depression, but since she doesn’t want to be in relationship with you, you will respect her wishes for distance. However, encourage her to connect with good friends for support since you won’t be there.

You’ll have to use your intuition on this one. You may wish to contact a mutual trusted friend or two and share your concern about possible depression. Ask them to give her emotional support and encourage her to see a doctor if they are agreeable. If you know her doctor, you can also call or write to her doctor with your concerns, but let your wife know when you do. The tricky part is that she may consider your actions invasive so you MUST have your intentions clear. You are NOT contacting your friends to spy on her or to force her to do anything. You are just requesting support and then giving your wife the space she feels she needs from you.

If you are overly invasive, your wife will push you further away. She’ll be able to sense your “attachment” to getting back together. You can let her know that you’re open to doing what you can to support her and you’ll do your very best to give her the space she feels she needs. Tell her that she can contact you if she wishes but you’ll refrain from contacting her unless absolutely necessary.

Then what I suggest for you is to get your own counselor. Model the behavior you’d like to see, even if she doesn’t know you’re seeing one. Energetically, you’ll be helping both of you by seeking help yourself. You’re feeling loss, so you can’t help her if you don’t get support as well.

Here’s one exercise that can do wonders while you are giving your wife “space”: Every day, in private, journal all the things you appreciate about her. Write down what her strengths are, what you enjoy about her and how she makes you feel. In doing this exercise, you are literally sending her healing energy waves that will help her depression if she indeed suffers from it. She’ll begin feeling relaxed and calmer when she thinks about you rather than angry and resentful.

One thing I want you to keep in mind, Brian. When I was separating from my husband, I was depressed as well. The reason was this: because of my culture and religion, I believed I was “bad” by choosing to separate. But I couldn’t stand being “ill” any longer, so I finally separated from my husband. When I finally felt I had a choice and I was making the right choice for me (despite arguments from my husband and my parents), my depression magically disappeared without having to take any drugs. Did I get help? You betcha! I had a team of counselors, healers and enlightened friends that supported me. I didn’t do it without support!

So Brian, lovingly give her “virtual” support through your Appreciation Journaling. Believe me, it works wonders if you are doing it with clear and unattached intention.

Blessings,
Dr. Karen Kan

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Dear Dr. Karen: How Can I Help My Alcoholic Husband?

Posted on 21 September 2009 by Dr. Karen

Here’s a great letter from Jan:

Dear Dr. Karen,

How do I help my husband, who is an alcoholic? I’m at my wits end. I’m tired of being married to him but I stay because I want to keep my family together.

Jan

Dear Jan,

What you face is uncomfortable and unfortunately very common. Do you ever wonder why you’re in this situation?

Here’s the answer:

You attracted an alcoholic husband so that you could heal a deep part of yourself that needs healing from childhood. Your husband is a mirror. He represents a part of you that you have rejected and do not love fully.

We call that The Shadow. To learn more about the shadow, I highly recommend that you view this film (preferably with your husband when he is sober and if he is agreeable), The Shadow Effect.

Everyone that we attract into our lives represents different facets of ourselves (the Law of Attraction). Our relationships can either be life-affirming or not. Some of the people we attract are representations of our Shadow. Your husband is one of those people.

I’m assuming you have children when you refer to your “family”. Your number one responsibility as a parent to your child is to lovingly model what you would like their lives to be. No matter what you SAY or TELL them to do, they will, on some level, model after one parent or the other (or both).

So what are you modeling right now?

Are you happy? I can see that you are not. So as each day goes by, you are teaching your children how to be unhappy. This may sound harsh, but I want to level with you.

Unless you get some support (and I mean MAJOR support) in your life right now to make some changes, you are literally sentencing those you love, your children, to a very difficult future. They will not have a healthy model of how to be happy. They will not have a healthy model of how to have a healthy love relationship.

You are so afraid of breaking up your family that you suffer from your inaction to do anything about it. Guess what? You’re family is already breaking up. You just can’t see it because you are willing to live this lie in front of your children in the guise that it is good for them.

It is not.

They know. Maybe not on a conscious level, but the negativity is seeping into their pores and you are letting it happen.

Do you love them enough to change?

Do you love them enough to do whatever it takes to figure out how to be happy so that you can model authentic joy and love?

Do you love them enough to stop waiting for your husband to change and instead, get some real help so that you can live the life of joy you were meant to live.

If what I say causes tears, I understand. If you were standing here in front of me, I would give you a hug, then hold you by the shoulders and look deeply into your eyes and tell you,

“You can do it. You are not alone. I believe in you. You will find a way.”

So to answer your question more directly, here’s my advice:

1. Get support. Call a trusted friend and have her take you to an Al-Anon meeting every week. You won’t feel like you’re all alone anymore.

2. Read Melanie Beatty’s book, Co-Dependent No More starting tomorrow. And when you’re done, read the next book, Beyond Co-dependency. You can find these at the Law of Attraction in Love Bookstore.

3. Write down your intentions on exactly HOW you want your life to look…and make sure none of what you wish to manifest depends on your husband changing anything.

4. With the support of your Al-Anon or a counselor, take action to change your life. Your dream will not manifest without action.

From the patients I have had that have gone through what you’re going through and come out the other side, I can share with you that “breaking up your family” is one of the least harmful things you can do.

I can guarantee your husband WON’T change if you don’t. If you do decide to leave him, expect begging and pleading and promises to change. If you love him sober and wish to be with him that way, then consider waiting for at least six months of sobriety and AA meetings (for him) before you even entertain the notion of moving back in with him.

Sometimes, when an alcoholic knows that he is going to lose everything he value most, it is the motivation they need to change. Sometimes, it isn’t enough. But if that’s the case, then you know that you and the children don’t rank (and why would you want to stay in that kind of relationship anyway?)

I wish you the best. Go get some help today!

When you get a chance please connect with me on FaceBook and Twitter.

Blessings,
Dr. Karen Kan

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