Tag Archive | "letting go"

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Wisdom from a Teenager

Posted on 10 May 2010 by Dr. Karen

I’m always amazed by kids. Here is one that inspired me last week.

The other day, my teenage patient, Charlie, was in to see me for a doctor’s appointment. I was so inspired by him and what he told me that day that I called him later to get his permission to share his story with you. I get teary-eyed just thinking about it.

Charlie is very laid back, according to his parents, unless he is racing cross-country in skis. On this particular day, I asked him how things were going and as usual, he answered, “pretty good.” For some reason, I asked him if he had any stressors recently, physical, emotional, mental etc.

He paused for a moment and I sat forward to listen (because he usually says, “no, not really”). Apparently at school, he just found out that another student had deliberately smashed every single one of his ceramic art pieces. For weeks, he’d make something and then find it broken the next day. Innocently, he figured his ceramics skills were just “shotty” and for weeks, he just kept trying over and over to do it correctly.

So when he finally figured out they were deliberately being broken, I asked him how he felt. He said he was shocked at first (“I didn’t know I had any enemies!”) and then mad as he began to take it personally, but then he told himself, “Well, there is no point in being mad. It not gonna help anyway.”

So he just let it go.

Did you hear that? He just let it go. That’s typical Charlie. He’s been like that his whole life I think.

So I asked him, “So you’re not mad anymore? I wouldn’t blame you if you were.”

“No I’m not mad anymore,” said Charlie with a sideways smile, an eye peeking out of his long bangs.

“You know,” I said, “…maybe the other kid was jealous of you and that’s why he/she broke your artwork.”

Charlie chuckled in agreement and said something to the effect of,” Yeah, I figured that I might as well believe that…it makes me feel better.”

Did you catch the wisdom in this young man? I can assure you that at that age I, personally, would NOT have let go of my anger and disappointment that easily (probably would have cried for days…maybe even weeks!) and I would have made up a story that someone hated me.

Amazingly, Charlie CHOSE a belief that served him. He decided that even though he didn’t know the motive of the perpetrator, he chose to believe a story that served him, rather than one that just kept him mad.

How many of us choose stories that serve us? How many of us remember that we actually co-create  our realities anyway? As a refresher, our realities are composed of: 

The Situation + Our Perspective              

It is the next part of this story that moved me the most. As we were talking, I received a strong intuitive hit as to “why” Charlie was being targeted. He told me he was the only kid who this happened to. Nobody else had their artwork destroyed.

“Hey Charlie, I figured another reason why YOU were the one targeted.” Charlie listened intently.

“Just suppose, this kid that did this is having a really stressful time at home. Maybe her dad is an alcoholic or he gets abused. Maybe the anger has to come out somehow…and Spirit (God) understood that. Of all the kids in that school, Spirit figured that YOU would be able to tolerate the pain and be able to handle it whereas most other kids wouldn’t. So God chose you. Spirit chose you, Charlie, to be the One because she knew you’d be strong enough to handle it. If it were another kid, maybe he’d be so devastated that it would ruin his self-esteem for life. But not you, Charlie, because you have a Gift most of us have to work decades to develop. And you have this Gift naturally. You have the ability to just let go.”

After I blurted this “story” out, I knew it to be true in my heart. At the very least, it would “serve” us to believe it. I was looking into the eyes of a Master who doesn’t know his mastery yet because he is young.

At this point I’m looking into Charlie’s eyes with complete awe and inspiration and he’s beaming from ear to ear.

So maybe if you’re having a hard time in your life right now, is it because God chose you to be the One, just like Charlie? Would it help you to believe that? Are you willing to be chosen for this job? And will you transform the negative energy of the world’s ills instead of being squashed by it? Charlie does it naturally.

Bless him!

So what do you choose to believe about your life today?

Tell me what you think of this blog post by commenting below. Thanks.


Dr. Karen Kan

PS. By the way, Charlie said his teacher decided to lock up his artwork from now on after class! (You don’t have to keep taking abuse. One can be practical too you know!)

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