If you’re like many of my coaching clients, you’ve probably have experienced some degree of pain in your romantic relationships. Not only that, the pain from our familial relationships have a long-lasting impact on us in that we, through the Law of Attraction, continue to experience “re-runs” of the emotional issues we have subconsciously repressed through our childhood.

If you’ve purchased my eBook, Creating Your Fairytale Love Life, you may have done some work on clearing some of this “old” emotional baggage through an energy psychology technique called EFT.

Another energy psychology tool I’ve been introduced to recently is called TAT, Tapas Acupressure Technique. Instead of tapping on your acupuncture points, the TAT method includes holding your acupressure points during a clearing process where you put your attention on a set of specific statements.

If you’ve tried EFT and it hasn’t worked for you, or you want to learn something new (like me!), you might want to join me on Monday November 15th for my Law of Attraction in Love Blog Talk Radio Show, as I interview TAT creator, acupuncturist Tapas Fleming. Tapas has helped thousands of people with her technique who have suffered from various issues including phobias, anxiety, excess weight, trauma from abuse and rape, financial stress, to name a few.

After facilitating personal growth for many years, Tapas Fleming became interested in physical and energetic healing. She became a Licensed Acupuncturist and began her practice in 1987, specializing in the treatment of allergies. Searching for a simple, effective treatment, she developed TAT in 1993. Tapas soon realized that in addition to relieving her patients’ allergic reactions, TAT was clearing the effects of their past stressful or traumatic experiences in an easy, gentle way. Now one of the most celebrated leaders in energy psychology, Tapas has taught TAT to hundreds of thousands of enthusiastic people worldwide. She always finds it a great pleasure to teach TAT because it is so empowering and liberating and supports people in creating a vibrant, healthy life full of meaning and fulfillment. Tapas lives in Torrance, CA where she has a private practice.

Here are the details:

Monday November 15 at 12 noon EST
www.timezoneconverter.com
www.blogtalkradio.com/drkaren

Call in number: (347) 945-6313
Hit “1″ if you’d like me to see your “hand up” to ask a question

Feel free to ask a question during the show! If you can’t make it live, you can always listen or download the recording anytime at www.blogtalkradio.com/drkaren.

Enjoy!

Blessings,
Dr. Karen
www.LawofAttractioninLove.com

Dear Dr. Karen:

Hi there.  I struggle with a concept – serenity comes by not being attached to the outcome. You have to have intention and I know, for example, that when dating – you shouldn’t be attached to the person or outcome.  How do you keep yourself detached as best as possible?  Also – how do you recondition bad beliefs – is there any quick way?

Anne

Dear Anne,

Wonderful questions! I’m so glad you asked. You are perfectly correct in that our “job” is to make an intention and then “let go” of attachments to the outcome. When we “let go”, The Universe can more easily aid us in shifting people, places and things so that our intention will be manifest. When we do not “let go” and become attached to the outcome, we actually block our manifestation. Why? Because the energy of “attachment” is vibrating at the frequency of scarcity.

In other words, if we become attached to our outcomes, it means that we can’t envision any other way that The Universe can create a win:win for us. When we can’t be open to all the wonderful possibilities that may be even BETTER than what we imagined, we often get LESS than what we imagined or wanted.

So how do we learn to let go?

There is no one right answer. The first thing to do is to check in with yourself to see if you are indeed attached to the outcome. How? Well, what you do is imagine for a moment that your intention isn’t going to manifest. How do you feel? Neutral or disappointed? OK or devastated?

If you have a so-called negative reaction, it means you are attached. Now, if you find you are attached it isn’t the end of the world. In actuality, you are one step closer to manifesting your dream by ACKNOWLEDGING your attachment. You can’t let go of something you haven’t acknowledged. Understand?

Once you’ve acknowledged your attachment, you can now work on it. One thing you can do right away is to affirm that you love yourself despite your attachment. Don’t be hard on yourself. It is human to get attached. Be kind and compassionate with yourself. That action alone can often release the “tight” energy of attachment.

What I’ve found is this: once your attachments have led you to disappointment time and time again, and you are paying attention to your reaction, you will eventually learn to do a “pre-emptive strike” on your attachments. The pain just isn’t worth it.

An exercise you can do around your attachments is to imagine how well you off you will be regardless of the outcome. In other words, imagine several different outcomes including the one you want. Then literally “make believe” the reasons why each of these scenarios actually serve you. Answer questions like, “how are you better off?” and “what did you learn from this?”

Why make believe? Because our whole reality is made up of our perceptions of reality. If our whole reality is truly an illusion we make up, then you might as well make up an illusion that serves you and empowers you rather than one that disempowers you. Make sense?

As far as reconditioning your negative (non-supportive) beliefs, there are many different tools you can use. There just isn’t enough room to list them all. At the Law of Attraction Intensive Workshop in September, we used several different tools to discover what some of our negative beliefs were. Then I taught the class a specific tool called Emotional Freedom Technique (you may remember this from Chapter 5 of my book, Creating Your Fairytale Love Life) that transforms non-supportive feelings and beliefs. I highly recommend learning EFT. The other methods I recommend is The Sedona Method and The Work by Byron Katie.

One “quick” way to recondition your negative or non-supportive beliefs is to write the belief down on a sheet of paper. Then underneath it, ARGUE the opposite. In other words, if you wrote down: “I’m too old to find my soulmate”, then you can begin by writing down an argument that sounds like this: “I’m the perfect age to find my soulmate. I know myself better than ever. I’ve been in several relationships already and I have a clear idea of what I want and what I don’t want. Thus I can manifest what I desire a lot easier than when I was younger. Besides, I’m no longer afraid of being in relationships. I know I can handle anything that comes up. I love maturity!!”

Get the picture?

Anne, you are on the right track. Don’t worry about being perfect. Just keep practicing. It’s like an art.

Blessings,

Dr. Karen Kan